The members of our organization and the executive council would like to kiss as much of America's ass as possible to show how deeply we regret this country's inability to kill even more of our people in "The Diapers" and in our beloved Homeland.
And while we're rooting around down there for an open spot we'd like to remind all Americans that we've done all we can to help pay for those killings, on top of which we've agreed to remain silent except for when we help out by villifying Islam and jumping and humping every rumor we can...and planting them when we can't find them. And if there is anything else we can do to help slaughter our own people, you only have to ask...because we firmly believe that by a deft combination of enough killing and ass kissing...we will get Assyria back...and then we'll wash up, get off our knees and be the Grat Peepil we always knew we were.
signed
SMAAK!
Society for More Assyrian Ass Kissing Inc.