Posted by Alli (160.129.27.22) on January 23, 2002 at 12:28:43:
In Reply to: Re: you are beautiful! posted by Melody on January 21, 2002 at 17:33:13:
"... this is why I feel empathy for anyone who gets racially profiled these days because it could be me or male members of my family next."
it's very true. it's hard for me to trust people - i keep my guard up, but i also try to get close to the people i like... in some sense, i sort of "collect" friends (of all sorts of backgrounds - some are pretty wild, others are interesting in different, more quiet ways - each person sort of accentuates the beauty i see in the others) after i watch them & interact with them for a while. it is impossible to know what's on anyone's agenda, but i trust my instinct now. growing up with an "Iraqi" dad in a military town in the US during the Gulf War was not very fun, but it opened my eyes, & it enhanced my trust in some people even though it took away my trust in others.
for instance, my boyfriend is American, but he lived for 8 years, before i met him, in the Czech Republic, Taiwan, & Japan (traveling to other places when he had the time & money), teaching English & familiarizing himself with the people & cultures he encountered. despite his travels & respect for other cultures, sometimes, i think that things would be so much easier if he actually was ethnically Mid Eastern or Finnish, but he's not. he doesn't really "understand" either side like i do, but he appreciates me for whatever it is that i stand for & respect - that much i can see. & i took it as a really good sign, when we met, that he has traveled so much. he doesn't feel as deeply as i do about certain issues, but he does agree with me a lot from a more learned, removed, & rational perspective... which i think enhances my feelings for him & about the issues i care about even more.