Posted by Alli (160.129.27.22) on January 29, 2002 at 17:11:49:
In Reply to: Alli Darlin´ posted by pancho on January 29, 2002 at 16:25:20:
Julia's really bright & has a good bit of insight. you have the same "good" traits, but she clearly lacks the life experiences you have had, & consequently does not have your wisdom, pancho. so, sometimes she sounds very naive, to me, & i don't think that the way to argue with her is to be so harsh. rather i think that you could gain a lot of ground with her if you were more understanding of her character & gently firm about your stance (because, in the end, i agree with you on every issue). & ultimately, it would be nice to win over someone with her brights - we need every capable, smart man & woman we can find if we're gonna get anywhere in this world. she CLEARLY wants your acceptance & attention - & these are NOT bad things to want from someone, especially YOU (because, my dear, sweet pancho, you are like a god to most of us here, especially me). i like both of you, a lot. & i'm definitely not holding back, either.
for instance: when you want an animal to trust you, you don't beat it or yell at it. instead, you quietly open your hand palm up & extend it toward the animal's nose (for a safe sniff or 2), crouch down on the ground, & look it in the eyes (so it can see you're honest), talking as sweetly as you can, occasionally pausing between nonsensical, light, sing-song utterances to let silence work its charms as well. it works, even on the wild ones, unless the animal's been beaten by a human before. i've done this with raccoons, baby squirrels, semi-wild horses, birds, cows, & stray cats & dogs. it just takes a bit of patience & a lot of kindness in your heart - they sense it just like humans do. & if you have a treat, they may like you even more.
i'm not saying Julia is an animal, but i am saying that these kinds of ways can be extended into the realm of human interaction.