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'THE WEEK-END OBSERVER' Posted By: Kakovitch <ivankakovitch@aol.com> (cache-ntc-ad01.proxy.aol.com) Date: Saturday, 28 February 2004, at 2:26 a.m. ‘THE WEEK-END OBSERVER’ ‘Who’s Who in the Future Government of Assyria’ By Kikia (All similarities between persons dead or alive, is purely coincidental). Once the Government of Assyria has been established the following are recommended, to fill the seats: President of Assyria: The Honorable, Mr. Youma T’ Khanenia (His name sounds very Assyrian, and he is the longest serving Assyrian President, ever [9 months] Vice President: The Honorable, Ms. Shahiran Daniels (The President is not her cup of tea, and she is not his idol—their competitive agenda to gain the hearts and minds of Assyria will improve the product, I mean productivity) Prime Minister: His Excellency, Mr. al-Farid Alekhis (He is always gentle, polite, and responds to all the questions from the public) Secretary of Defense: His Excellency, Freddy Beit-Upran (He is extremely nationalistic, and forthright, and his last name dignifies his defensive stand) Secretary of Offense: Her Excellency, Ms. Marganita Yonatan (She hands it to all, rather well) Secretary of State: His/Her Excellency,- - - - - - - - - - - - -? (The first choice was Mr. Butros Basoora, but, lately, his diplomatic skills have dwindled in favor of impassioned acts of nationalistic fervor [probably, because of all these ‘Passion’ themes posted on this Forum]. Therefore, he has been recommended to be the Assyrian Ambassador in our Embassy in West Virginia. With his impeccable English, he could be an excellent asset for diplomatic feats with West Virginians) (Any volunteers for the Office of The Secretary of State? Please present your portfolios on this Forum, for evaluation, and consequent appointment)* Secretary of Treasure: His Excellency, Mr. Sharrokin Mar-Isho (He just got a bundle of money, as a compensation for his unrelenting services for Assyria) Secretary of Interior: Her Excellency, a/k/a ‘Persi’ (I believe it is SHE—I am a Republican, although I never vote for them—I like to distinguish between the genders in all phases of life. Actually, my first choice was ‘Persephone’, but she is under a contract for a few more decades, as the Goddess of ‘Evaddon’) Attorney General/Grand Inquisitor: His Excellency, Youkhanna Mishael (He is very religious, and is well aware of all the blasphemers) Inspector General/Chief of Police: His Excellency, Al-Baradai Mishael (As the brother of the above, it is a good idea to keep, arrests, prosecutions, deportations, exiles, executions, all in the family) Secretary of Transportation: His Excellency, Senator-for-Life, Mr. Juan Numero Uno (This choice is excellent, since Mr. Numero Uno has traveled extensively, and more than any other Assyrian on behest of his nation) Secretary of Labor: His Excellency, Mr. Ashur Guilani (This is an excellent choice, since he has performed miracles in the last 4 years as the President of the American Chaldeoassyrian National Association [CANA]) Secretary of Health, Education and Welfare: His Eminence, Mar Badal Souroyo (His studies in the fields of all the religions of the world, will be of great benefit to Assyria and its ecclesiastic co-nationals) = = = = = = = = *This happened before. A story was circulating the halls the U.S. State Department, a few decades back, that immediately post WWII, the U.S., after becoming aware of the existence of the country by the name of Afghanistan, hurriedly decided to open an Embassy there. No diplomat from the State Department volunteered, in fact, many even resigned their duties with the Department, because of fear of being nominated as Ambassador to that country. So, an ad was placed in the ‘New York Times’. An applicant, a husky, gray-haired gentleman applied for the position. When asked what were his qualifications, “As a barber, the only thing left to do between the walk-in customers, was to read ‘The New York Times’ which I did every day, for the past 47 years.” He got the job. = = = = = = If members of the Cabinet wish to be left alone in their respective fields of Government services, they ought to contemplate to send this writer to the most dangerous, or far away post. I strongly recommend, the Embassies of Assyria in Kurdistan, or Ulan Bator, Mongolia, if the first one failed in its quest of independence. Cordially, Kikia --------------------- |
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