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=> Ode To Popeye

Posted by parhad (Guest) - Wednesday, March 3 2004, 17:04:37 (EST)
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...now there`s one of the few genuine heroes of any age and place. The guy is a working stiff like most of us. He`s scrawny with bulging forearms that come with tossing bullshit aside. He chews on a pipe but never blows smoke anywhere. He doesn`t drink...he never picks fights, is unfailingly courteous...has a mean squint that shows an honest guy can look through things with one eye...if it`s screwed on right. He never fusses about his clothes or appearance except when it`s time to impress his goil.

Popeye loves Olive Oyl...about as plain a Jane as there ever was who`s nonetheless given to primping her meagre stock of appeal and adjusting her bones here and there...but Popeye doesn`t care for looks...the old swabbie sees right through all pretense right in to the heart of that stick...and he pines for her and moons over her passionately...yet he`s never forward or disrespectful, though sometimes in his eagerness to do right and often in her own defense, he has been known to tie her in knots or allow her to get perilously close to mortal extinction.

Popeye has a nephew named Swee Pea he loves as if he were his own child...and watches out for as best as a single guy on leave can do. His uncle is every bit as jolly as himself and became an enterprising old gent with a chain of burger joints named for him so there is good capitalist stock mixed in there with the Round Table chivalry.

And of course there is Bluto...Popeye`s nemesis and perpetual rival for the hand of Olive...and it is only here, in matters of the heart and then only when he`s been taken cruel advantage of that Popeye reveals that other admirable side of his character: He is a vegetarian and a damned fierce one too.

Whenever there is danger to anyone else...or to Olive, especially if Bluto is behind it...Popeye will try to resolve things on his own..with no extra help...but when the world gangs up on him..when Bluto cheats and won`t play fair for Olive`s hand...then Popeye pulls out his can of spinanch...but only when all else has failed...kindness...returning goodness for ill treatment...Reason...Tolerance...even great patience in the face of horrendous personal discomfort...but there comes a time when Popeye will endure no more...though we all know he could..but something makes him say..."this much and no more"...and that`s when the gloves come off and Justice prevails.

We in America used to be Popeye...we`re all Bluto now.

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