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=> Zindalite Gets Horked

Posted by el iraqui (Guest) - Thursday, January 22 2004, 21:10:13 (EST)
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...there are some interesting things in Wilfred's message here...about as much as there is in his magazine...lsiten up!

Dear Reader,

On Tuesday evening, between 7 and 10 p.m. (Pacific Standard Time) our website was
the target of a hacker's malicious computer attack which rendered our online
services ineffective for a period of 24 hours. Z-Crew's technical team was quickly
placed on round-the-clock alert.

...there is NO Z crew. There's Wilfred and his apartment and his car in the garage and that's it. He has a cousin or two here and there who chat with him infrequently and provide "NEWS FLASHES".

Yesterday afternoon we were able to re-load our
files, including our entire archives section and the Calendar of Events.

...This is supposed to cause gasps of relief...Assyrian wind can be sucked back in...the Nayshun can breathe easy again...we were supposed to be panic stricken at the thought of all those GRAT writings being wiped out. Actually Wilfred probably forgot to pay the elecric bill...but this is much more "newsworthy".

This morning I was informed that no section of Zinda Magazine's website has been
lost to the attack. It appears that a hacking program was released to the Internet
attacking our servers in California. The damage at Zinda Magazine is now contained
and all affected files have been remedied.

...Oh thank GOD...I wuz SooooOOOOOO worried. I've thought Zinda and Wilfred in particular were always "affected".

In the meantime please rest assured that neither yours nor any subscriber of Zinda
Magazine's personal information was accessed during this attack, and our firewalls
effectively protected our database information.

...Oh praise the Lord again...otherwise we might learn the real identity of the person you didn't marry.

Our corporate Internet Service Provider is working with Zinda Magazine to further
investigate the nature of this targeted attack.

...I suppose Al Qaida will be found behind it...it was probably Wilfred himself "behind the wall" playing with matches...ahem. Investigation my ass...come on Wilfred...loosen the garter belt alright already.

Sadly, we were not able to bring you this week's issue as our technical team is
still working on enhancing the security of your favorite Assyrian medium of news and
information. Instead please visit our News Update section on the left hand side of
our homepage for daily news updates.

...do you believe this shameless hustling? I'm convinced now there was attack or nuthin...nuthin more than an attempt to get some heartfelt and dumb letters to the editor praising this "institution of news gathering" with some encomiums about what a rare servive Wilfred provides...ahem. Cheap marketing ploy...that's all.

I would like to thank you and hundreds of other subscribers who showered us with
their emails and messages of concern yesterday. Zinda Magazine will be back next
Monday with a new issue, complete with our acclaimed editorial, feature articles,
and accurate reporting.

...ain't no such thing happened. Assyrians don't shower anyway and they don't do it in the hundreds...I know, I've tried. It's hard enough getting one of them in the shower with you. Wilfred HAS no "hundreds" of subscribers...he has no "subscribers" at all...he has people who wander in and out because there's enough of nothing going on there that they feel comfortable...feels familiar and secure and gooey and fuzzy and warm all over.

Your support of our journalistic efforts is always appreciated.

...you wouldn't know a "journalistic effort" if it undressed and blew you. Though you would appreciate it. You lying, sleazy, wheezy, mincing, lisping, myopic turd. Aren't you the one who said you couldn't print an article because you had "hundreds of people in Washington DC reading and didn't want to offend THEM"!

...you WISH!

Sincerely,

Wilfred Bet-Alkhas

...so where did the "Bet" come from all of a sudden? Is that your new married name...or are you gonna be a maiden forever?

Editor
Zinda Magazine
http://www.zindamagazine.com

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