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=> recipe...

recipe...
Posted by farid (Guest) - Monday, November 10 2003, 11:11:23 (EST)
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Having been admonished by Isht'd Wardia to refrain from formulas, I've decided to try a recipe instead. Surely Ms Wardia appreciates recipes...if she can't quite wrap her lips around a formula.

First we need to know what it is we want to "cook". That's crucial of course for a cake is quite another animal from a stew (it's my recipes and I can chop, blend and frappe metaphors all I want to). Let's say it's an Assyrian Kitchen we're in and it's soon to be dinner time...or is it a birthday we're providing the cake for? See, right there you get a glimpse of our dilemna...we don't even know what we want. Some in the family are expecting desert...some want something more substantial. What's a cook to do?

One thing we know for sure is that this cook of ours will wait till the last minute...with the guests coming up the driveway before even getting out a pot, or a pan. That alone sort of determines what the finished product, cake or stew, will taste like. Assyrians do nothing till a crisis...we don't act, we react. Anyway, here's a list of ingredients:

A bushel of ZOWAA
3 dozen organizations
12 Christian denominations, finely chopped and separated
One Major Crisis(A war will do)
3 gallons holy water
magazines
TV stations
Dead and/or Suffering Christians
Salt
Pepper
Sugar


Take your War...sift out dead and/or suffering Christians. Separate the denominations and divide generously among the 3 dozen organzations. Sprinkle with 3 gallons holy water...shred magazines and fold in bushel of ZOWAA...removing the core first. Add salt and pepper...or sugar and pepper...or just sugar, to taste. Place in a greasy pan...or heavy pot, if you still aren't sure what you want and bake in a 450 degree oven...or cook at high heat over flame for 1 1/2 hours. Depending on the results, either stick candles in the thing when it cools and top with whipped cream or serve piping hot in bowls. Up to you.



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