The Inside Assyria Discussion Forum #5

=> I Shouldn`t Be Here

I Shouldn`t Be Here
Posted by pancho (Guest) - Sunday, February 25 2007, 20:43:39 (CET)
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I shouldn’t be reading or writing about Dr. Joseph’s book…shouldn’t be questioning my modern Assyrian heritage. Not after having so successfully parlayed it into slightly over a million dollars in gross sales of sculpture, of modern Assyrian sculptures no less, to modern Assyrians and not after I wrote my name on two modern Assyrian monuments, which took 17 years of my life’s work and cost me a few hundred thousand dollars of my own, signing off on the erroneous modern history(not ancient), written on a bronze plaque and prominently displayed on the pedestal of one of them for millions of people from around the world to read for the next 500 years or as long as The United States and San Francisco last.

If anyone should have a passion, as well as the egoistical urge, and economic incentive as well, to believe he is a modern Assyrian, it’s me. I’ve had grown people kiss my hand, bow and almost kneel before me in gratitude for having “brought respect to us” or “told our story”...worse yet I’ve been the cause of giving our young people, especially two young girls in Chicago who stood transfixed before the plaster model of the monument of Shumirum and whom I’ll never forget, reason to feel “pride” in what I suspect now is a grand fraud played on us all, by the usual suspects, and which I, Ashur forgive me, unknowingly and unthinkingly played on them.

I should also not be here, on this forum or any other, writing as I do and have been for the last six years...writing and writing and writing, a million words, hundreds of hours, ten thousand posts at least. I should not be here because I should have been driven away, not by a single intellectual challenge or the number of people writing in opposition, to each of whom I tried to give cogent and thoughtful replies, laced with as much sarcasm as they asked for, but by the sheer force of their intense dislike and fear. I should have been driven away by them, away from modern Assyria long ago...if not by their effectiveness and knowledge then by their personal, pissant threats, feigned indifference, or insults hurled at my family, wife and children…and dead father.

But here I am...for if any god worked in a mysterious yet uproarious manner, it is my Lord Ashur.



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